Seventy Five, the big Seven Five
It’s diamonds, no more gold. Just diamonds, all diamonds after a certain point in time.
After a certain point, from what I’m reading, every anniversary becomes a diamond anniversary.
They say that “diamonds are a girl’s best friend”. (Really???)
My Mom and Dad - I love you Mom, I love you Dad - they were married, on this day, apparently a Thursday (of all days), seventy five years ago - today.
Happy (diamonds again) Anniversary - Mom, Dad. Happy Anniversary.
^^^^^
My Mom’s Parent’s Neighbor told my Grandparents that they saw Fay and Art, sneaking out from the side of the house. (In my Grandparent’s house, that would mean that my Mom and Dad must have carried a suitcase (I imagine) out from the raised side of the house, kitchen door.
There were only two ways in and out of my Grandparent’s house, and the front door would have exposed my Mom and Dads exit with suitcase in hand, to a whole street full of nosy neighbors. (Good plan Mom and Dad. Good plan. And still, that one (next door) neighbor who could see - of course, they did see (you two).
Tip toe down four or five, steep wooden steps, onto gravel driveway, my Dad’s car (whatever it was then, in 1949, something boxy and big I imagine, maybe with running boards, big headlights).
Slide the suitcase, quietly onto the back seat floorboard. Opening and closing the trunk would be too noisy. Mom slips into the passenger side, Dad behind the wheel. (Giggling, lots of giggling, I imagine.)
They peel out. (Not really “peel out”, but that’s a fun idea. Adds drama. But still, a getaway. (The ultimate getaway. You wanna Get Away? Southwest Airlines)
My Mommy and my Daddy, they drive a short one hour east and a wee bit south to some little town, very close to Colgate University. Planning and pre-arrangements were made. My Dad had a plan.
Just the two of them and maybe a Justice of the Peace. Maybe a small church with a kindly old Minister. Maybe a young Hipster (it was the time of Hipster) Minister?
Whatever the plan. Nuptials. Fay, Art, I do declare you, husband and wife.
>>>>>
I know so little, so few details. I’m sure I asked my folks questions, but it’s all fuzzy wuzz in my mind. Apparently, not much of what I learned - stuck. (Strange…)
When it comes to my Mom and Dad’s wedding day, it’s a whole bunch of empty file folders in my brain.
Really, the best that I have is supposition = educated guesses.
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So many questions. So many questions - come into my mind.
Where were my Grandparents when this “sneak out the side door” (no doubt, well planned, well oiled) operation took place?
Was it a nighttime event? Middle of night. Wee hours of morning?
Unlikely, I think, unless both of my Grandparents were stone cold deep sleepers. (A nighttime operation was unlikely)
Morning, Noon, Evening? Perhaps my Grandparents went grocery shopping together, every Thursday afternoon when the new advertisement flier, weekly sales started at the local A&P. (Maybe, maybe…)
Perhaps my Grandparents had a dinner date. Going to dinner dates with Family or Friends at some favorite restaurant in nearby Skaneateles? My Mom took a pass. (Yes, maybe.)
A weekly morning pancake breakfast at their church in town. (Maybe that was it.)
But there WAS a plan. There was no text messaging then, “let’s do this thing - on a whim. None of that. Things happened then, with intent, by diagram and plan.
Planning was required. And then to wonder, when, how did the plan hatch and begin?
Planning by the dashboard lights?
**
“I couldn't take it any longer, Lord I was crazed
And when the feeling came upon me like a tidal wave
Started swearing to my god and on my mother's grave
That I would love you to the end of time
I swore I would love you to the end of time!”
**
(song lyrics - Meat Loaf, a Singer, big Dude, his stage name was Meat Loaf. No really. Crazy right? Look him up. Look him up.)
^^^^^
My Mom was 19. My Dad had just turned 21.
They met, as best I can remember, the story goes, on a blind date arranged by mutual friends.
My Mom worked in the (big - Syracuse) city courthouse. Some administrative job. My Dad, I think, worked for the railroad. Loading, unloading railcars at a depot that was located - city center.
A date. Blind date. And - - - boom, LOVE.
Nymphs flying around heads with bows and arrows. Stars circling. Birds chirping. No bees - yet. But dreams of birds + bees.
Love, love, love and jet fuel. Ready for take off. Destination - unknown.
Somehow, I don’t think my Mom and Dad dated long, not for too long, before the plan hatched.
My Dad kept a photograph of my Mom (all his life I think), in his wallet. He showed me after she passed. He said he used to show it (my Mom’s photo) to his Friends. He told his Friends that he thought that my Mom looked like a Movie Star. (I don’t know which one. And… it does not matter.)
My Dad, he was a nice looking guy. Independent, he had dreams, he worked (always) hard. Reliable, nice looking, hard working (blue collar) man.
My Mom, she grew up in the country. Farm living - wasn’t the life for her.
My Dad, he grew up in the (big - Syracuse) city. City life - wasn’t for him. He longed for land and country and - a fast car. (Not really a fast car. Just a car. Dad loved his wheels.)
**
Just a small town girl
Livin' in a lonely world
Just a city boy
Born and raised in South Detroit
They took the midnight train going anywhere
**
(slightly altered song lyrics - Journey)
^^^^^
I expect that my Grandparent’s (Mom’s parents) printed these marriage notices (featured at the top of this piece) and sent them to family and friends - after my Mom and Dad returned from their big adventure (elopement wedding and a northeastern honeymoon loop.
I’m not sure, but I think maybe Boston, NYC, maybe Philly were on the honeymoon, road trip itinerary, and then a loop back to home base via Pennsylvania.
My Grandparents probably printed and mailed these announcements so as to go at the eggshells. Eggshell stomp… Stop a little bit of the scuttlebut gossip, the talk, talk, country talk that would be all the rage of that place and that day.
People talk. Good heavens, what will they think? People talk.
My parents rented their own apartment, a duplex somewhere near the zoo, in (what was then) a nice neighborhood.
**
And even though we ain't got money
I'm so in love with you, honey
And everything will bring a chain of love, oh, oh, oh
In the mornin', when I rise
You bring a tear of joy to my eyes
And tell me everything is gonna be alright
**
(song lyrics again: Loggins & Messina - Danny’s Song - nice, right?)
They were young. All the world was ahead of them.
So much, clear blue sky, runway - in front.
Fun was simple. They had simple fun. I recall stories of how they would “make noises” (kissey kiss, smooch, smooch) in their new apartment. And then, put their ears to the thin wall, to listen to the comments and conversation from the older couple who lived in the duplex apartment, next door.
Oh those newlywed kids.
Giggles and laughs - - - simple, simple fun.
^^^^^
A boy (my brother). A brand new home (in the burbs). A dog.
Another boy (me). A new car.
Additions to house. Vacations.
A girl (my sister, middle name - Joy).
And time, time, time
I remember a very good, very pleasant (even though I had my issues). I remember a very good childhood. Happiness in the home my Mom and Dad made for us. A happy home. A good place.
Issues, yes - everyday, family stuff. But overall, wonder and joy.
That is how the story, Art and Fay, that is how (as best I know) their story, lives together, how it all began.
Where I came from.
A beginning, a start, two become one, and yet - they remain two.
But a team, at least for a good while. A team. A very good team.
I would like to think of the two of you together now, giggling again, Mom and Dad.
By the dashboard, ears to thin wall, giggling again…
Simple Joy
Love this piece.