Trojan Folk
A long time ago. A long, long time ago,
When I was young. When I was much, much younger. (Not this photograph - young)
A young woman told me that I was “a great Guy”. Me, “great Guy”.
I wore a condom. I put on a Trojan.
(What a brand name, right? Who came up with that one? What the hell man. Wow.)
When I was young I used to think - only stupid people have kids that they don’t want (to have). Only dummies have kids that are not wanted.
I used to believe that. I did.
But, Me? A great Guy, because I put on a Trojan. Really???
What a low bar.
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We watched a documentary last week, not a biography, but kind of an expose about an infamous - REALLY bad guy.
The worst - guy, scum, bad guy, worst person in the world - and how, somehow, his appeal remains and lives on - to some. Some still follow - THAT guy.
Some are drawn to - THAT guy. (Bet he never put on a Trojan - that guy.)
Unwanted children, probably his specialty. (That guy.)
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And it got me to thinking. THAT guy.
I was thinking, I bet THAT guy had a bad Mom. A poor Mommy.
I bet, THAT guy, I bet he had an - F grade - Mommy. A failing Mom.
A Mom who never wanted him. Did not love him. Made him feel unwanted.
It’s NOT an excuse for bad behavior.
But I bet that guys Mom, made that baby feel really bad.
And then - THAT guy, he grows up (or never grows up, he just gets older) - that guy, he takes it out on whoever he can.
THAT guy - some guys - watch out WORLD.
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I (so fortunate) am not, THAT guy.
I was wanted. My Brother, My Sister - wanted. Very much, SO much - we were wanted.
Never questioned it. Knew it. We all knew it.
Lucky Us.
I moved (still move) in circles of mostly WANTED children.
The people I know, mostly, no question - all wanted children. My Friends were born to Moms and Dads who loved them - wanted them.
We are fortunate. (Fortunate Sons (and Daughters) - Sons and Daughters of - Fortune. Fortune 500. (Do I have 500? Friends)
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Photograph - What the hell with the photograph Scott? How does it fit in with this story, this thought?
What are you thinking (Scott - Great Guy, Trojan wearing Scott)?
I don’t know.
My Mommy was great, she loved me. I know that. But, she was not perfect.
You see, my Mom, too much, would not, too often did not - love - Herself.
My Mom would cut Herself - OUT - of photographs.
(I wish you wouldn’t. I wish you didn’t - do that - Mom.)
My Mom was, for much of her life, overweight. And she did not like that. Didn’t feel good about herself - and so, solution - cut yourself out.
Leave little Scotty sitting there, all dressed up, on the sofa - ALONE.
That does not make me angry, an angry Boy.
It makes me sad. Leaves me - - - sad.
Mommies - whatever age you are, whatever stage of Mommy you are at - and it IS a lifelong job
You are SO important. So important.
Let your Babies know, however old they are, that YOU love them.
Never cut yourself out. Don’t leave your children sad.
We know you love (loved) us. You must find ways to love - yourself.
Do it for your kids. Show them the way - ways.
Be great.
We ARE wanted.
We are -Trojan Folk.